A Momma’s Struggle with Modern Christianity

A Momma's Struggle with Modern Christianity and Perfection

As you probably already know, I am a Christian.

Even though I grew up in a Christian home with Christian morals/perspectives that helped shape who I am; I personally made the choice to follow Jesus. My mom didn’t make my choice, my sisters didn’t make my choice, no one did… except me. And, I am so glad I did!

I went through rocky paths with my beliefs during high school and college;mainly because I was struggling to find out for myself who I was and what I wanted to stand for. That awkward stage between childhood and adulthood is scary! But, I came out alright and decided that following Jesus is what I wanted to do the rest of my life.

So, what I am trying to say is that I am proud to be a Christian and I love my God so, SO much.

But I have this problem with “modern Christianity” and it has all to do with image; our image. 


A Momma's Struggle With Modern Christianity and Perfection


Oh mommas, let’s not forget that Christianity is not about Instagraming (is that even a word?) the perfect bible picture. It’s not about putting decals on our cars or wearing “Jesus and coffee” t-shirts. Sure, those things are FUN but I think we are confusing the world with what Christianity really is! These things are simply an image — they do not truly reflect what’s in our hearts.

So here’s why I decided to write this post…

My husband was talking with a non-believer the other day about Christianity. The non-believer told my husband that he “can’t stand” Christians. When my husband asked him why (since he was a Christian himself) the man told him, “because they make me feel like I am not as good as them.”

Wow, just wow.

But isn’t that somewhat the truth? My husband told me about this conversation that evening and I actually had to — somewhat — agree with the point this man was trying to make.

Why is it that so often after I end a conversation with a “Christian” that I feel worse about myself than when we started talking? I seek advice and search for wisdom but too often I am left feeling like a naïve child.

And, how is it that I leave certain Christian gatherings feeling as if I am the only one with struggles and problems? So many of us hide behind fake smiles and the expectations of having a perfect life.

I think many modern Christians are beginning to become confused with expectations versus reality. Partially because we have developed a habit of laziness; relying on what other people tell us and what we think it should be RATHER than relying on God’s word (AKA, the bible).


Here’s a couple expectation vs. reality I came up with… 

  • Expectation: We need to be the good and perfect in the world.
  • Reality: We will never be fully good or fully perfect because we live in a fallen world — Jesus is the only person with that kind of power.
  • Expectation: We are good.
  • Reality: Jesus is good; we are made good through Him.
  • Expectation: If we reveal another person’s sin to them then they will acknowledge it and fix it.
  • Reality: Yes, we are called to show people the truth. But at what cost? To the point that we make them feel inferior? The reality is that we will never be good enough without Jesus but how can a non-believer believe that? More is said through kindness (just as Jesus did) and actions versus flaw picking and accusing. Besides, “why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?” Matthew 7:3.
  • Expectation: Someone is superior.
  • Reality: We are ALL equal. You can find references in Galatians 3:28 and Acts 10:34. We are not better than a non-believer — we are equal.
  • Expectation: Sharing our good deeds and Christian activities throughout social media will give us brownie points with God.
  • Reality: We cannot “earn” brownie points. All we can do is live God’s way and not OUR way; following Jesus until death.
  • Expectation: We need to live perfect lives.
  • Reality: Did we not pay attention in Sunday school? There is a battle of good and evil which means our lives will not be perfect. We WILL struggle. Why do we try and hide it?

Mommas, let’s make a pact to NOT get caught up in hiding behind a “perfect” image that us modern Christians believe we need to withhold! We are not perfect, we struggle, we have problems; let’s open up with like-minded individuals and lean on them for support. God did not call us to go through this life alone! We are made to want relationships with friends, spouses, and with Jesus.

You struggle, I struggle — let’s be the light in each other’s lives that get’s us through this dark time!

Christianity is not about being perfect, it’s about trusting God to bring us through the imperfect and seeking Jesus who is, in fact, perfect! 

A mommas struggle with modern Christinaity







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